Black as my heart feels
29 Oct 2011 3 Comments
in Personal notes Tags: black, death, friends, hair, halloween, mom, party, sadness
I don’t know why exactly but I’m really missing my mom these days. She’s been gone since 2.16.2008…. and even though that’s been a few years it seems like yesterday. I guess it’s because of Halloween and I’ve been noticing all the Halloween stuff in the store and everyone seems to have their hair dyed black. Well, my mom had black hair and it was straight and really long…. well it was when I was younger. Everyone tells me I look a lot like her but my hair is dark brown and not a little wavy. So I started wondering….. if I dyed my hair black and straightened it, would I look like she did in my memories? Well, it’s done… I got one of those boxes of non-permanant hair color that washes out in 28 shampoos. Now I just have to straighten it. Hmmmm I wonder…… will I see her again in the mirror.
Coincidentally, I have been invited to a Halloween party at a friend’s house. So I bought a costume and my hair will actually go with it. I haven’t dressed up for Halloween in years and years and years. It seems so strange but I could really use a night of fun and laughter. I am going to do my nails too and I haven’t done that in a long time either! Wowzers! I hope I have fun. I have been kinda sick (catching something) and was laying down most of yesterday feeling queezy… so hopefully that wont cause any issues for me and ruin a fun evening.
I’ll take lots of pictures!
the little things
28 Dec 2008 1 Comment
in Personal notes Tags: friends, gift
I got a note today (Dec 22). It was at work taped to the door to a cabinet where we leave messages for each other. It was just written on plane notebook paper and had a gift certificate to barnes & noble inside. The note said…
This gift is for you.
There is $1 for every time you listened when no one else did. There is $1 for every time you hugged me. There is $1 for every time you will do it again.
Thank you.
I looked inside and the gift card was for $100! It simply said “from your friend”. I have no idea who it could be from.
I am actually surprised, considering I have been so down and gloomy since my mom died. Thinking that I helped someone else is surprising. I wish I could help myself, hug myself maybe… well, maybe I’ll just go to B&N.
a wave of nostalgia
15 Oct 2008 Leave a Comment
in Family Tags: anastasia, Family, fandub, friends, music, nostalgia, toy story
| 1. | a wistful desire to return in thought or in fact to a former time in one’s life, to one’s home or homeland, or to one’s family and friends; a sentimental yearning for the happiness of a former place or time: a nostalgia for his college days. |
| 2. | something that elicits or displays nostalgia. |
solstice and invisible lightning
22 Jun 2008 Leave a Comment
in Family, Photos Tags: Family, friends, lightning, solstice, wedding
Yesterday was June 21st, the longest day of the year. In Alaska during the summer solstice it doesn’t get dark. We went to the festivities down town and enjoyed walking the streets looking at the handmade goodies and watching people gorging on fattening junk and pointing at teenagers with metal barbs in their faces. I did end up getting a soft serve ice cream cone from Fancy Freeze which was fantastic and I snapped pictures with the sun still shining bright late into the evening.
I saw my friend Gretchen there who is soon leaving me. She’ll be driving to Nashville to meet up with our mutual friend Linda. The brat!
We went to a wedding earlier in the day for our friends Monica and Kent. It was absolutely beautiful and HOT!!!!! We sat through a very long ceremony in a small sweltering church…… but it was so beautiful! They are a beautiful couple and I’m so happy for them. The service was perfect too. I enjoyed every minute of it (except when I had to stand repeatedly with my skirt plastered to my butt with sweat). They were married at the Immaculate Conception catholic church which is a historic church in Fairbanks. It is very beautiful inside. The reception was very nice too and we had a wonderful time. We saw so many people we hadn’t seen in so long. Most of them friends of my husbands but it was interesting to see how many of the people knew each other through different ways. The wife of one of my husband’s friends grew up next to another guys wife in another state. It’s a small world.
Today it is raining, with occasional gusts of clean air being forced through my screens. I love the smell of rain. I don’t like thunder though or invisible lightning. The sky is so bright you can’t see anything but a light grey misty looking sky. We usually like to count the seconds to see how far away the storm is but you can’t see the lightning. Only occasionally can you see the house lights flicker and nearly go out. Fun.
My dad got remarried today. I hear it was a nice wedding. I can’t wait to see the pictures. They will be here on the 15th of July so I can see them too. I hear they are a good match…..both as ornery as the other.


















